“To listen with the whole of our being—our mind and body—takes training. For many of us, the intellect has taken over the throne. When our body is activated and brought online more consciously, we bring gentle awareness to larger parts of ourselves. So, we're not just hearing intellectually, we can participate with embodiment, and a subtle state change occurs, Somatics invites conscious participation and relationship with the body. It helps us notice when there is agitation in the system, and when we're translating the world through a restrictive emotion.”

“We can acknowledge the more difficult emotions, and give them a seat at the table. A helpful approach is to move into a place of intimacy with anxiety, accept that it may present sometimes, and that is OK. You can be more curious about how anxiety moves through your body, and inquire deeper into how that relationship affects you. When you give it more time and space, there is a familiarity and acceptance of the state that may be part of your experience and the landscape that is you.”

“We create ceremonies around cultural rites of passage to show the person that they're more capable than what they thought. Big changes in life can be seen the same way. Death and grief puts you in a place where you're essentially in a state of emergency where you see there's a deeper strength—a potential for you to cope with things that you didn't realize that you could.”

“Grief is meticulous in its work. These sacred spaces tend to be overwhelming, and may not feel loving or beautiful. But, they stretch us and crack us. They break us open, but we’re not broken. There is a sense of being broken, but the break allows us to understand more and grow. The wound can become a scar, and the scar is a symbol of healing. The scarred tissue is actually stronger. Scars are a sign of wisdom in many cultures—that a person has been places.”

“We have genetically inherited personality traits. We see parts of ourselves in our mother and father and other family members. When we're coming into relationship with ourselves, and being curious about our mannerisms and behaviors, it’s helpful to see our internal landscape as a garden we've inherited. When we personalize events too much, we're overwhelmed by the situation. When we embrace the view that we’re a custodian of our psyche, it's not a way to avoid responsibility, but it gives us a bit of space to understand that the landscape in which we are working is far older than us. Then, we have an opportunity to tend to our garden and the landscape in which we've inherited, and care for it, improve it, and leave it better than when we received it.”

“When you give someone your heart in a romantic relationship, you are handing access to the places of yourself in which you hide from the world. You’re saying: ‘I'm letting you see that which is most sacred, that which I'm yet to understand and integrate into my being, that which causes mischief and overwhelm and confusion in my life. I'm going to let you into those worlds.’ The most sacred gift that I give to the person I choose to be in a deep relationship with is my trauma.”

“Being in a healthy relationship is not the absence of conflict. It's about giving it the space it deserves, grounding yourself, continuing to work on your stuff, owning your part in it, seeking repair, and trusting that your partner has something to offer that can help you be a better person in the world. You have an obligation to find the right words, to care for each other's vulnerable parts, and to be present in the conflict, and what you're seeing with as much gentleness as possible.”

“I spend more time caring for my body than trying to solve reality in my mind. When I'm caring for my body, I'm calm and can step forward. When I notice a restrictive thought, instead of finding a narrative to explain it, I add more breath to my body, and work with what my body needs.”